125: Thoughts on Once a cheater from Ester Perel…

125: Once a cheater…

“So often we want to take this behavior and now reduce the entire person to just that.” – Esther Perel

101.5: Unringing the Bell (Epilogue)

101.5: Unringing the Bell (5 of 5) – Epilogue

As my life with C fades to a distant and ringing echo I will move forward with intention. The lessons remain.

I’m excited about the possibilities.

101.1: Unringing the Bell (Part 1 of 5)

101: Unringing the Bell (1 of 5) – No excuse

There is not a way back after the first act. I cannot unring the bell no matter how many lies I tell or secrets I keep about my betrayal.

And I had many of both.

Holding Back by Fridays Guest Writer (04)

Did my affair happen because of loneliness or fate? Maybe due to love of sex or to my lack of sex. I’m not sure which drove me to cheat; but to this day, I still cheat and have no regrets.

89: Road Warrior

Many people would run for their own reasons. Many people run from their humiliations and anxiety. Me? I’m staying to face my humiliations, anxiety, and failure.

That takes courage and honesty.

Friday’s Guest Writer: Goodbye (03)

Goodbye by Friday’s Guest Writer (03)

20 months you were in MY husband’s thoughts and heart. I’ve ran through so many emotions and feelings towards you. Today I’m left with pity. And nausea. And fury.

Friday’s Guest Writer: Sucker Punched (02)

Sucker Punched by Friday’s Guest Writer (02)

My name is Jen, and I am a betrayed spouse. If you are reading this, I am sorry that this has happened to you. However, maybe you will find something useful as you navigate this journey.

65.9: 2 Days: Magic Brain Hertz

2 Days: It’s all Hertz

The justification and rationalization for hating C are always easy to find. The brain is a rationalizing, justifying, negative thought manufacturing machine broadcasting thoughts at 50 hertz.

60: Why

I’m still not sure I have a real answer why I betrayed C. I’m not sure I will ever be able to provide a personally or socially satisfactory answer to the question.

22: Broken

How can I hope for her forgiveness when I cannot forgive myself?