anxieties – Love Letters to a Healing Heart

52: My Anxious Bladder

November 12, 2019October 3, 2023 Wanders

I hate admitting anxiety is an issue. “Anxiety is for women. Real men don’t get anxious,” my Pride tells me.

Thoughts on Pema Chödrön’s Curious about Existence

May 4, 2019October 3, 2023 Wanders

There was a great deal of beautiful qualities in my relationship with my ex…but she is not the flower. She is not the reason it was beautiful. She is not the blossom or the tree. Our life was beautiful and it bloomed because that was the season and we both contributed to the season..

Our life together blossomed because it was our choice. Now it’s time for a different choice.

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Moving Closer (Part 5)

March 11, 2019October 3, 2023 Wanders

If I love you too often I’m conflict avoidant. An uncomfortable pattern with family relationships and romantic relationships.

There are reasons for that right?

26: Thoughts on Triggers

March 3, 2019October 3, 2023 Wanders

Here is the thing: if I want to be less trigger-happy (triggery? triggered?) I need to deal with my shit. Me. No one else.

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Winners and Losers (Part 4)

February 23, 2019October 3, 2023 Wanders

Long before I have a conflict with others I have conflict within myself. Who wins? Who loses?

I create my own reality and therefore I’ve created the conflict.

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Lawyer Mode (Part 3)

February 19, 2019October 3, 2023 Wanders

I see in the situation of infidelity, there will never be agreement about my intentions, motivations, or reasonableness but Buck is challenging us to discover what we can “create together.” To focus on the solution and not “fall into countless volleys of ‘you said…I said’ back and forth.” This unskillful approach “usually increases tension and decreases connection.”