Where I described her as my anchor, I realize she was simply a mooring and we lacked a secure attachment.Read More Thoughts on Mark Nepo’s The Bee Comes
Their podcast helps me understand my responses, and therefore, the responses of the people around me. If I can see myself more clearly I can see those around me more clearly too.Read More Thoughts on Therapist Uncensored’s Brain Science 101
The truly loving action is to listen and then tell them, ‘No.’ Changing something simply to make someone else feel better is the path to my lost integrity and shattering of my character.Read More Thoughts on the Next Step to Health by Mark Nepo
The narrative that has choked so many meaningful intimate moments in my life is the false narrative, “You deserve to be happy but if there is a conflict that must mean there is something wrong. Not with them, but with you.”Read More 30: Thoughts on Unicorns, Chumps, & Other Mythological Creatures
I wrote as a plea to be heard. By someone.
By her…but in the quiet of the night, when love and grief can no longer be shouted down I hear the repressed whispers of knowledge reminding me the woman I long to hear from will never return.Read More 29: Saudade – The Deep Longing
Too often I sense my grieving keeps me focused on things outside my control. However, with time and loving intention, my grieving gives way to a renewed focus on my own patterns, roles, choices, and opportunities.Read More 28: I am a leaf on the wind
Here is the thing: if I want to be less trigger-happy (triggery? triggered?) I need to deal with my shit. Me. No one else.Read More 26: Thoughts on Triggers
Long before I have a conflict with others I have conflict within myself. Who wins? Who loses?
I create my own reality and therefore I’ve created the conflict.Read More Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Winners and Losers (Part 4)
“Change happens one funeral at a time.” At the time we were talking politics. However, in the years since I heard her say that I’ve come to appreciate this truth.Read More Thoughts on 36: Cleaning Out the Wound by CadConfessional
I see in the situation of infidelity, there will never be agreement about my intentions, motivations, or reasonableness but Buck is challenging us to discover what we can “create together.” To focus on the solution and not “fall into countless volleys of ‘you said…I said’ back and forth.” This unskillful approach “usually increases tension and decreases connection.”Read More Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Lawyer Mode (Part 3)