Love Letters to a Healing Heart
"Be not the slave of your own past – plunge into the sublime seas, dive deep and swim far, so you shall come back with self-respect, with new power, with an advanced experience, that shall explain and overlook the old." – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Anger reminds me that when someone feels entitled to slam a door (or phone) to end a conversation, I am not obligated to open the door again for them. In this relationship, anger reminds me that surviving and flourishing means their silence and entitlement need not manipulate me.
Read More 09: Stories of AngerAs I recently was reminded, we sometimes have to re-experience the pattern to know we’re outgrowing it…
Read More 06: Distancers and the Silent Treatment (Part 1)In Cameron Crowe’s 1989 American teen romantic comedy-drama film Say Anything…, after Diane Court (Ione Skye) breaks up with John Cusack’s character, he stands outside her house loudly playing Peter Gabriel’s song, In Your Eyes, over a boombox. A modern version of Romeo’s heartfelt petition to Juliette. At the movie’s end, Court’s father goes to jail for […]
Read More 05: Say Anything…Regardless of how you experience the intention and impact of infidelity, we all are manipulated by the stories, expectations, promises, ideals, traumas, and fears we bring to the experience. We are the fictional Everyman seeking to protect the imagined safety of the stories, even as the stories eat up our lives.
Read More 02: Auditing My LifeThe willingness to truly see Painter as who she is means seeing myself as I am in that pattern. And to see this truth is to live with remorse and regret, and experience sorrowful grief.
Read More 67: Sorrow and GriefI’m not ungrateful. Painter’s gift is really a reminder to myself that she is not who she pretends to be, and because of that, I owe her nothing but time and distance.
Read More 64: Gifts of the SeasonI was never confused about Painter’s decision to end the relationship. Although I was hurt and sad, I was never confused. I understood.
Read More 61: Relational BlackjackPainter is unsafe and dangerous for me because I struggle to see her for what she does. I sometimes forget how skillful — and willing — she is at getting other people to carry her water.
Read More 59: Thoughts on Kindness and ToxicityYou are, however, not perfect. But neither is anyone else.
Read More 55: Zero Sum Love, ReduxPainter sat at the defendants table and announced with absolute certainty, “This is all your fault.”
And I wonder, “Which part is my fault?”
Read More 50: Stories of Blame
You must be logged in to post a comment.