96.1: Join Me (WTF was I thinking?)
Reading what I write is your choice. I’m not responsible for your choices, thoughts, or feelings. It is why I lied and kept secrets. I’m responsible for telling you the truth and being honest.
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96: Join Me!
As I approach the six month benchmark the next step is to make my writing private. I hope you will subscribe by email or Wordpress.
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Holding Back by Fridays Guest Writer (04)
Did my affair happen because of loneliness or fate? Maybe due to love of sex or to my lack of sex. I’m not sure which drove me to cheat; but to this day, I still cheat and have no regrets.
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90.2: A Perspective on C (Part 2 of 2)
I’m still left to guess at C’s motivations. However, at this point at least I have some perspective and knowledge.
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90.1: A Perspective on C (Part 1 of 2)
I want C to be happy, joyous, and free. If not with me, then where ever she is and with whoever she chooses. I want for her what I want for myself. All I ever want was for her to be more fully herself.
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89: Road Warrior
Many people would run for their own reasons. Many people run from their humiliations and anxiety. Me? I’m staying to face my humiliations, anxiety, and failure.
That takes courage and honesty.
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87: Dogs and Cats
A dog simply wants to love you, be accepted, and be loved. He wants to belong. You own them.
But a cat? A cat owns you.
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Goodbye by Friday’s Guest Writer (03)
20 months you were in MY husband’s thoughts and heart. I’ve ran through so many emotions and feelings towards you. Today I’m left with pity. And nausea. And fury.
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85: Running Scared
I only know what the trolls’ think. I will never know what C feels or thinks because, like so much of my relationship, she lacks the courage and willingness to tell me. That gives her power.
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84: Exist In The Moment (One more thought)
This is the only path to rediscovering my self-respect and power. It is the only path to transform myself and my life.
More vulnerability, not less, is the only path to my heart.
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