On Friday I helped a friend cater an event at a local brewery. For reasons I am still sussing out when we arrived I had a full blown anxiety attack. The first serious and debilitating one I’ve had in a very long, long time. I couldn’t focus. I couldn’t remember what people ordered. I couldn’t […]Read More 05: Hidden Lessons
Sure there are monsters, but in truth, most of what we are calling monster behavior is simply someone doing something stupid for stupid and innocent reasons. It’s just poor judgment, not pathological.
There are actually very few monsters.Read More 11: A Love Letter to the Betrayers: The Monsters
If I love you too often I’m conflict avoidant. An uncomfortable pattern with family relationships and romantic relationships.
There are reasons for that right?Read More Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Moving Closer (Part 5)
Long before I have a conflict with others I have conflict within myself. Who wins? Who loses?
I create my own reality and therefore I’ve created the conflict.Read More Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Winners and Losers (Part 4)
I see in the situation of infidelity, there will never be agreement about my intentions, motivations, or reasonableness but Buck is challenging us to discover what we can “create together.” To focus on the solution and not “fall into countless volleys of ‘you said…I said’ back and forth.” This unskillful approach “usually increases tension and decreases connection.”Read More Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Lawyer Mode (Part 3)
Intentions don’t matter when u r bleeding out emotionally. There is no room for nuance when performing emotional triage on your identity and life.Read More Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Intentions, Not Excuses (Part 2)
As I read and begun to have an understanding of Brown’s intentions, I started to recognize how foreign these concepts are to my life…and why.
Like pain, I have to learn how to make conflict my friend.Read More Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: The Pattern (Part 1)
I packed up everything and moved to Pittsburgh last week. I don’t see myself ever going back. I don’t want to be here but none the less I am.
And that’s that…Read More 24: And that’s that
“It can be true that your husband is a kind, good-hearted soul. And also true that he made choices that hurt you deeply.” via Elle Grant, AuthorRead More 152: Paradoxes
I miss her. Sometimes I would just sit in the living room and watch her paint. I know she has been struggling with creating. I hope this is the start of her uncorking her creative bottle.Read More 141: It’s not about me