144: Thank You

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter.

Izaak Walton

Yesterday was not a good day. I’m not sleeping well, someone told me about C’s date, and the fucking honesty project the doctor has me doing left me angry. Which is good. I need to be angry. However, I learned long ago that focusing on the solution, and not the problem, is the only healthy path forward.

As such, by the end if the day I sat with a friend and made a list of people, places, and things that help keep me grateful.

I want to make a moment to thank all the men and women that have walked with me, listened to me, held me while I grieved, provided vulnerable feedback, encouraged me, and were honest with me over and over and over during this ten-month sojourn as a I navigate these often treacherous crossings.

On more than one occasion the acceptance, patience, and kindness of friends, family, and strangers are the emotional bridges that have kept me from drowning as I move emotionally and spiritually from one place to another, across 16 states and over 50K miles over the last ten months.

Never doubt the importance of even the smallest of kindnesses

If nothing else, this long winter of my life has brought me truer friends and family, helping me go from one shore to the next.

I want to especially thank the Wandering Fire, Star, Lucky Girl, and the Hostess for taking my hundreds of phone calls over the last ten months and never once telling me to “get over it” or denigrating C. Not once have you called C a “bitch”, mocked my pain, or scoffed at my Passion or Love.

You consistently help me see things from C’s experience while helping me uncover the truth of my journey. As the Wandering Fire has taught me: “If there is no hope for you, there is no hope for any of us.”

You’ve done this knowing that when C calls I will go and lovingly listen to her. You are teaching me how to face myself and others with an open, vulnerable, and perfectly imperfect love.

The four of you have always treated my failures, and my love of C, respectfully while never letting me avoid responsibility. You’ve done this over and over without ever mocking me, or C, or Our life together.

You made the time to hear me and my truth.

Thank you.

I don’t know what awaits me on the other side of the next bridge but I’m determined to cross with enthusiasm, passion, and intention. I’m determined to cross with a vulnerable and open heart. I’m determined to cross with integrity, honor, self-respect, and power.

When all is said and done I will honor the friendship, love, and patience you have shown me by giving freely what you’ve taught me to love others.