"Change happens one funeral at a time." At the time we were talking politics. However, in the years since I heard her say that I've come to appreciate this truth.
I packed up everything and moved to Pittsburgh last week. I don't see myself ever going back. I don't want to be here but none the less I am. And that's that...
I am willing to accept far less than I offer in exchange for being loved, to be important to someone. I was willing to do the work - mine and hers - and avoided bringing my needs and wants of the Partnership. I acted as if I wasn't as important as her.
I'm left to lie to myself so that I can remain angry enough to justify not caring any longer. It requires maintaining a general apathy towards my own truth, and a casual dismissal of my heart, and therefore to my life.