141: It’s not about me

I miss her. Sometimes I would just sit in the living room and watch her paint. I know she has been struggling with creating. I hope this is the start of her uncorking her creative bottle.

140: Parable of the Prickly Porcupine

I realize now my anger and defensiveness were about armoring my heart. I cannot get to where I want to go when weighed down by my anger’s armor.

140: Parable of the Prickly Porcupine

I realize now my anger and defensiveness were about armoring my heart. I cannot get to where I want to go when weighed down by my anger’s armor.

137.02 Birthdays

Every September 15th for the past five years I was there. My heart breaks that this year I won’t be. I did what I could on your birthday to let you know you matter, that you are all that matters, that you are loved. That I would always be there. What more could I have […]

132: Nepo’s Elves

If you only see me because of what I’ve written, or because of what others have said, or because of what you think of my betrayal, you don’t really see me.

You never have.

127: Monkeys in the Middle

I’ve gone to lengths not to put people in the middle of my situation. I don’t want anyone else to carry my water.

126: Grrr…

The pain will never go away. I will only find perspective for the pain. It is a part of me now. To hate the pain is to hate myself; to love myself is to love my pain.

122: FFS

I miss you. Woke up dreaming of you again.

Eight months today.

119: And so it goes

“How often we murder parts of ourselves by not letting things advance or come close. How often we let fear rule our emotional lives. How often we kill or chase away everything that moves.” – @MarkNepo