55: Zero Sum Love, Redux

You are, however, not perfect. But neither is anyone else.

51: A Frank Story

Of all the friendships I lost in those chaotic first few months, the one I miss the most (besides Painter) is Et Al.

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Moving Closer (Part 5)

If I love you too often I’m conflict avoidant. An uncomfortable pattern with family relationships and romantic relationships.

There are reasons for that right?

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Winners and Losers (Part 4)

Long before I have a conflict with others I have conflict within myself. Who wins? Who loses?

I create my own reality and therefore I’ve created the conflict.

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Lawyer Mode (Part 3)

I see in the situation of infidelity, there will never be agreement about my intentions, motivations, or reasonableness but Buck is challenging us to discover what we can “create together.” To focus on the solution and not “fall into countless volleys of ‘you said…I said’ back and forth.” This unskillful approach “usually increases tension and decreases connection.”

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Intentions, Not Excuses (Part 2)

Intentions don’t matter when u r bleeding out emotionally. There is no room for nuance when performing emotional triage on your identity and life.

25: Of Apples and Badassery

There was little room to learn how to express feelings, needs, and wants in a way that is vulnerable when it is met with derision, contempt, competing interests, and sarcasm. So I don’t think I was afraid of vulnerability as much as having a definition that equated it with weakness resulting in abuse.

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: The Pattern (Part 1)

As I read and begun to have an understanding of Brown’s intentions, I started to recognize how foreign these concepts are to my life…and why.

Like pain, I have to learn how to make conflict my friend.

24: And that’s that

I packed up everything and moved to Pittsburgh last week. I don’t see myself ever going back. I don’t want to be here but none the less I am.

And that’s that…

20: A Letter from the Good Doctor

I acted in ways involving plenty of shitheadery but it pales in comparison to the shit our imaginations make up to keep us locked in fear in an attempt to keep us safe.