Thoughts on Memories by Reconcile4Life

What is the truth and how do you know?

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Lawyer Mode (Part 3)

I see in the situation of infidelity, there will never be agreement about my intentions, motivations, or reasonableness but Buck is challenging us to discover what we can “create together.” To focus on the solution and not “fall into countless volleys of ‘you said…I said’ back and forth.” This unskillful approach “usually increases tension and decreases connection.”

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: Intentions, Not Excuses (Part 2)

Intentions don’t matter when u r bleeding out emotionally. There is no room for nuance when performing emotional triage on your identity and life.

25: Of Apples and Badassery

There was little room to learn how to express feelings, needs, and wants in a way that is vulnerable when it is met with derision, contempt, competing interests, and sarcasm. So I don’t think I was afraid of vulnerability as much as having a definition that equated it with weakness resulting in abuse.

Thoughts on Conflict Transformation: The Pattern (Part 1)

As I read and begun to have an understanding of Brown’s intentions, I started to recognize how foreign these concepts are to my life…and why.

Like pain, I have to learn how to make conflict my friend.

24: And that’s that

I packed up everything and moved to Pittsburgh last week. I don’t see myself ever going back. I don’t want to be here but none the less I am.

And that’s that…

17: Shame Trap

Shame cannot survive in secrecy. What is your shame?

Thanks @LeapCast for the food for thought.

23: More of This and Lots of That

For nearly a year I gave away my Power and self-respect to Silence. I know what needs to be done.

Maybe I always knew but lacked the willingness to face it.

22: The Protector and symbolism

Heroes are expendable. When it was hard she left and never looked back.

I’m done being anyone’s Hero. I’ve paid my dues. I want to be a King to a Queen. I’m not disposable.

It is her loss.

21: A Reality Check with the Good Doctor

I am willing to accept far less than I offer in exchange for being loved, to be important to someone. I was willing to do the work – mine and hers – and avoided bringing my needs and wants of the Partnership. I acted as if I wasn’t as important as her.