Tag: gottman institute

24: Getting it Right

Wanders

“I’m here to get it right, not be right.” – Brene Brown

I acted dickishly. And by dickishly, I mean I responded with bravado to avoid being vulnerable to a woman I love whose anger still wounds me after all this time.

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Thoughts on Pema Chödrön’s Curious about Existence

Wanders

There was a great deal of beautiful qualities in my relationship with my ex…but she is not the flower. She is not the reason it was beautiful. She is not the blossom or the tree. Our life was beautiful and it bloomed because that was the season and we both contributed to the season..

Our life together blossomed because it was our choice. Now it’s time for a different choice.

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Thoughts on Ghosting by Esther Perel

Wanders

When I saw Esther Perel’s continuum summarizing a Relationship Accountability Spectrum, I was like, “Holy FUCK! Ghosting?! That is exactly what has happened over the last year! That is what she did! That is how I feel and behave! I’m not crazy or irrational!”

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Thoughts on Ghosting by Esther Perel

Wanders

When I saw Esther Perel’s continuum summarizing a Relationship Accountability Spectrum, I was like, “Holy FUCK! Ghosting?! That is exactly what has happened over the last year! That is what she did! That is how I feel and behave! I’m not crazy or irrational!”

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27: Thoughts on the Pursuer-Distancer Dynamic

Wanders

I will not pursue her or anyone else. Pursuing is clearly the mallet of my relationship communication toolbox. Now I know: my pursuing is selfish and fear-based. The behavior only adds to the problem.

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